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My Blog

Snow, cold, and stress, stress, stress...


Oh, I had to write something today before I go crazy. Writing is very calming for me and at times once I put something down on paper, it helps to release the tension I am feeling and helps me to have a better perspective on things.

As the rest of the US, we have been locked into frigid temperatures, snow, ice, and cold, gloomy, cloudy days. I think most people are stir crazy and are ready for a peek of spring.

But worse, is that we have an ongoing issue that has reached its climax and has me distraught, feeling frustrated, and let down. This issue is now robbing me of my ability to sleep, has raised my blood pressure, and has given me a backache that will not go away.

Even my husband is upset. He spent the whole day cleaning the house and has been working outside like crazy. This is his way to deal with stress, but I know he hasn’t slept well, either.

Usually, I handle stress really well. Nine children and all that accompanies that, taking care of my mom, etc. has given me many opportunities through the years to learn patience and to accept things that I thought I could never accept.

However, all the normal stress relievers that I normally employ, such as: exercise, breathing techniques, stretching, long hot baths, and so on are not working at all. I am teary eyed, want to cry at the smallest things, and am exhausted by troubled thoughts and dreams.

The thing that bothers me the most is that this issue could have been resolved long ago, but the blame game started and now it has reached a point where any conclusion is difficult.

I write about this in my book on Critical Thinking –that for some; blaming others for poor judgment becomes their escape and then they try to find new ways to blame or hide their own poor decision making.

And then the issue becomes that such judgments hurt others or makes their lives more difficult. Everything we do affects others and has an impact. Just as when we throw a rock in a lake the ripples continue outward and keep moving…the ripples we create in our lives touch and affect others as well.

I am trying to stay calm, but writing this has actually upset me more. I am so frustrated at this point that I just had a spasm in my back. I think I will just go the chiropractor, try to find a good book to take my mind off the whole thing (maybe it is time to reread, Pride and Prejudice…will Mr. Darcy take my mind off this?)

Well, one more week and this issue will have resolved itself; for either the good or the bad. And then I will just have to accept whatever outcome was wrought and then move on from there. Se la vie. 






















I do have to admit the snow is pretty and does clean the air.




















And the children have really enjoyed their snow days...

5 Comments to Snow, cold, and stress, stress, stress...:

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Kara Marks on Friday, February 07, 2014 12:39 PM
Prayers for you and your family, Tammy!
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Belle Anderson on Saturday, February 08, 2014 4:56 PM
Do not know what the problem is, but, take heart. There are things that can change our lives in an instant. We just made a 1295 mile trip to the Memorial Service for a friend of ours in the Houston, Woodlands Area. Not LDS. Nice service. We've known Jerry & Kitty for 62 years. Afterward we proceeded to our youngest son, Eric (age 54 and retired) in Round Rock, TX just north of Austin. Eric has two sons, Taylor, now 30, the cognitively disabled, Skyler, 32 with a companion and daughter now 10 months. Violet is our third great granddaughter and is progressing beautifully. While we were there, Skyler and his companion, Brin received word that her grandmother, aprx. 88 was in the hospital in Kansas City, Missouri with a bowel obstruction. Brin is in her final 3 months of receiving her RN. Meanwhile, Grandfather George (90) is raising Cain in the hospital to the point that Hospital authorities are threatening to commit him to a state care service (we know what that means, don't we.) Skyler asked Tom and I to drive the two hours from our home to Kansas City, Missouri to help relieve the crisis. We would gladly do it, but I developed a severe case of acute bronchitis. Skyler has a home based computer business so he can spend a lot of time with Violet using G'pa Eric as his relief when he goes out on calls. Brin and Skyler tried to alleviate the problem with her grandparents two years ago by getting them to move south to Texas with Brin and Skyler, but, no, independence was too important to the grandparents (George was a Captain in the fire department in KC.) Now it seems Skyler will have to leave his business, companion and child because one old man cannot behave himself. Whoever said life was fair? Meanwhile we get home and find our eldest son, Thor (59) has just resigned from his job as Chief Mining Engineer @ Freeport McMoran in Bagdad, Az. Seems one day last week he made a mistake, told his boss knowing what the consequence of admitting that mistake and was given the choice of resigning or firing. This particular individual has been a pain in Thor's side for 5 years or better. He has been looking for an excuse to rid himself of Thor. Thor is the Bishop of the Bagdad, Az. Ward. We are proud of Thor and his integrity. We have always taught our children that integrity is without price, now it is paying off (joke). So, now we are just waiting for the third shoe to drop. Kathy's husband (Brian Bean) is 2nd Counselor in Bartlesville 2nd Ward and travels throughout the Conoco Phillips Company, worldwide. Kathy is Young Women's President. Or, maybe it has already dropped. Both daughters, Emily and Rachel are home (ages 28 and 25) are home evaluating their lives. Rachel is filling out her mission papers, Ethan, their oldest son is on a mission in Sao Paolo, Brazil, West. Adam is in Salt Lake Business College. Poor Brian (57) is so tired and wants to retire and Kathy won't let him, not with where the kids are in their lives. Ahh, the drama of family, to have our little doublewide fill up again with an oldest son of age 59 in two weeks. But that's the reason we bought 80 acres, to provide a refuge for our children, grandchildren in time of trouble. Professional Civil Engineer, his wife Karen is a grant writer. Life is full of challenges, Tammy, embrace them, grow with them and for goodness sake, get busy and clean out those closets, great stress reliever!! Love you, think of you and your family often, tell Edna a big Texas "Howdy" from the folks who earned their living in Texas, went to Oklahoma for new knees, liked the prairie and decided to stay and go to church in Kansas. Not expecting any solutions, just know that all will resolve, "if it weren't for bad luck, there'd be no luck at all!" Belle and Tom
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Keira Holland on Thursday, July 03, 2014 5:24 AM
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curriculum vitae services on Monday, September 29, 2014 7:55 AM
I just loved the pictures of winter, you have shared. Is it true that winter or snow is analogous to feeling depressed. Somebody think so.
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